When I was a child, I was told that we should be nice to others. We should treat them as we wanted to be treated. As a child, I realized contradictions in this statement and I was deeply concerned that this formula doesn't always work.
"Nice to others" != "Treat others like you wanted to be treated"
Because we all think and feel differently. For example, some people want to receive phone calls from their good friends every other day or so, but others prefer phone calls once a week. More than that would annoy them. So if two friends are in these two different categories then both of them feel not treated right. Because one calls too often and annoy the friend, but the other friend doesn't receive enough calls and feel neglected.
So what would resolve this situation? Honest straight talk? That may or may not work either. For some people, they feel offended if someone says what he thinks and what he wants straight to them. There are different teachings in different cultures, too.
In general, these types of wisdom of dealing with people would only work for simple situations. You can safely assume that no one wants to be beaten, so you don't do that to others, but more complicated situations, you need to know the person you are dealing with. If you misjudge, that could create dramas and uncomfortable situations.
People get along better if their values and behaviour are similar. There are less misunderstandings and they can communicate better. What one considers nice is the same for the other. Sometimes there are people who are always fighting each other or getting along very well together. These maybe the type of people who are totally opposite end of values and behaviour patterns. Probably they misunderstand each other and start fighting. When they fight, they don't want to be nice to each other, so they do things they think the other doesn't like, but then that could actually cause the other to misunderstand that they are being nice. Then they might become friends again. I don't know, but it is interesting to think how people form friendship groups.
Image by "Picture Youth" on flickr
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